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    Friday, 21 September 2018






    The feeling of anger is part of human being. It is a normal and healthy emotion which is part of our default settings. No human being no matter how kind and softhearted would not feel angry or hurt at one time or the other. We get angry when we are unfairly treated, frustrated, deceived, attacked or disappointed.

    Anger is not necessarily a bad emotion. In fact, when we feel angry, it helps us identify things that hurt us which in turn motivate us to make changes. In some cases, it also helps us stay safe and defend ourselves in dangerous situations by giving us a burst of energy to either fight or flee in self defence.

    Anger only becomes a problem when we get out of control and harm ourselves, people around us or objects. You get out of control by expressing your anger in a destructive or unhelpful behaviour. Some of these unhelpful behaviours include:

    1: Outward Display of Aggression and Violence: This includes shouting, slamming doors, destroying or throwing objects or in the form of verbal abuse.

    2: Non-violent or Passive Aggression:
    This is displayed in the form of ignoring people or refusing to speak to them, refusing to carry out tasks or deliberately not doing them well.

    If you discover that you express your anger through outward aggression and violence, this can be extremely frightening and damaging for people around you - especially children. And it can have serious consequences like losing your job, destroying your relationship with people or your partner, hurting people around you or even yourself.

    We have articulated below some simple and practical steps which will help you in managing your feelings, especially that of anger.

    1. Acknowledge and own the feeling: Accept the fact that this feeling is yours and as a result, you can determine how best to use it.

    2. Become Calm:
    The only way to become calm is to do the right things which will help you think through the situation. You must resort to thinking instead of acting. As a matter of fact, the immediate response to anger should be…thinking. Think before you respond or even act.

    3. Now, while thinking..: You should try to identify the need, want or may be the injustice which stimulated the anger.

    4. Assess the situation: Your assessment should be based on the following questions.

    > How important is this in my life:

    > Is the situation such that I need a helper to help me get through?

    > What do you hope to achieve in expressing those emotions

    5. Who and who is involved:
    Before you take any action(s), you should first consider those who are involved in the situation and how much your decision will affect them. You might consider channeling the anger to a creative outlet or better still, change the belief that caused the anger.

    6. Decide to forgive.

    7. And again, decide to forgive.



    Feel free to share this beautiful piece with your friends, family, partner, colleagues and loved ones. Let's help us take charge of our daily moods.

    Thank you.


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